And to Ranjan Laha , my friend whose advice has helped my writing be whatever it is ……..
The Story so far …
Prakarsh Tiwari is doing his MBA at the Indian Institute of Welfare and Management . He is the events co-ordinator of his batch , has got a cool gang Badmaash Company which has Preety , Vibha , Nitu , Ankita as its other members . Life is almost perfect . Only trouble is that he is in love with a Brahmin girl who studied with him in Class 12. And that kind of changes everything ………
Terms you need to understand :
PARADIGM is the annual alumni meet of the Indian Institute of Welfare and Management . It is held during a Saturday evening . There is dance , loads of fun , and ofcourse beer .
Placement trips take place once a year where students travel to the metros and meet companies and introduce their B School.
OF SOMETHING CALLED LOVE …..
The love story of a Brahmin boy ….. its complicated.
CHAPTER 2
LOST AND FOUND
Even with the music playing at stupendous decibel levels, I felt the vibration of my cell phone. She had received the message sent her. “Meet me near the library at 9”. I looked at my watch. 8.55 pm. Time to go. As I walked down the corridor my eyes instantly caught the huge banner for the event tonight, PARADIGM 09. I passed room number 401. Students had lined up with coupons to have their share of free beer. I kept walking. Shahid Pervez of the junior events team was asking an alumni (almost desperately), “ Please give me your cell number , I need to update the database.” I smiled. Some students had already started feasting on the dinner. I just peeped into the lounge room where the event had been inaugurated. I saw my gang. Preety was busy pestering an alumni with something. Nitu Kaur was chatting with a senior who I heard had just got placed in IDBI . She looked at me and quickly turned around. Ha ha , GOTCHA….now I will tease her forever , I thought . I kept walking. Just near the entrance of the corridor ,Surya Sarathi , placement coordinator of the junior batch was talking to girl , “Chipak ke rehna mujhse , tuhje placement dilaa dunga .” I giggled . I knew this guy had talent . As I descended down the steps on my way to the library , I saw Tuhina and Ruchi , of the senior events team . “Prakarsh ,ek photo le na hum dono ki .” As I was clicking their picture a strange thought occurred to me .How come both my senior and the junior events team is present . But I didn’t have time to ponder over such useless matters. I descended to the third floor and looked around . The library . She was not there . Even on the third floor I could hear the faint noise of the music . Then I heard footsteps. I looked up and there she was. Rishika Bhardwaj , the girl of my dreams . I had seen her in a saree only once before, years ago. She looked splendid in the blue saree of hers, almost angelic. She was sweating because she had been dancing . Panting , she came near me and smiled . “ Hi .” , she said . I did not say anything to her. I had to do it today . I looked around . Grandfather was not there . Phew…. Grandfather always used to say that if a Brahmin met a girl alone , he was destined to rot in hell . I would take that chance tonight . I moved closer to her . Thankfully she did not move back . At one point I was so close ,I could smell her fragrance . I stopped . My physics friend at Presidency had told me that gravitational force operated between any two objects. I hoped that gravity would do the rest of the job . 10 seconds passed . Nothing happened . Bloody gravity . I decided no more depending on that maniac Newton and his laws of attraction ,I would have to do it myself . I put my right hand around her waist , almost casually . As if Mr. Baccchan suddenly popped up in my head , two options kept ringing in my gray matter , lips or the cheek , lips or the cheek , lips cheek , lips cheek ….. She closed her eyes .Wow she had put a mystic blue mascara . Stop concentrating on the mascara you idiot . Lips or cheek .lips or cheek . And then ………I kissed her on the forehead . It felt good . I looked at her . She just smiled at me . I hugged her gently . At that moment I wanted the time to freeze . I just wanted that this moment to last forever. Suddenly she spoke , “Pranu , o pranu .please remove your soft and pulpy butts .” I smiled . Pranu ??? This was the name Sushovan had given me during the placement trips that was to take place next year in 2010 . Strange . And Rishika’s voice sounded almost like Sushovan’s. I didn’t give this matter much thought . I was still holding her in my arms . She spoke again , “Pranu , please do your huggie now .If I enter the bathroom you will have to hagofy later” I felt someone touching my butt , almost sensuously . Control Rishika , this isn’t the time . But as I was about to tell her that , the image blurred , she was disappearing , going , going gone .
I opened my eyes . Sushovan Roy was staring at me with a wicked smile.
“Where are we ?” , I asked Sushovan .
Sushovan laughed and said , “Banglore , where else you dumbass . Placement trips.”
“ What is the year ?” I asked , not ready to be duped again .
“2010 my pranu .”
Even I was surprised at the irrationality of the dream . Rishika was doing her M.Tech at the Benaras Hindu University. When logic enters your dreams , nightmare follows .
“Kya hua ?” Sushovan asked ?
“ Arrey ek kiss miss ho gaya .” I said and went into the bathroom .
But then that was the closest I had ever gone to Rishika . It was a dream , but it would always remain very close to my heart.
I had never had the luck of talking with Rishika as much as I would have liked . Here I would like to make a few things clear , I never felt an emotion as strong as love when I was studying with her in Kendriya Vidyalaya . For a Brahmin love is a very dangerous word , because it always comes with an asterix marked above it saying ‘CONDITIONS APPLY’ . First , a Brahmin can never marry outside his caste , ofcourse there are the bravehearts but I am not one of those . Secondly a Brahmin is always expected to obey his parents decision on the choice of the girl . Its almost a contract deal that comes along with your caste . Thirdly , once you do manage to zero in on a girl , other CONDITIONS APPLY creep up , kundali , nakshatra , planets , orbits , bla bla bla . To make it easier for you people to understand , rebels are not the norms in my community . Ofcourse in Bengal I do see a lot of rebels who have married outside their caste . I was a Sandalyia gotra Brahmin . Ma had explained to me that Hindus had this strange grading system and Sandalya gotra was the highest grade . My actions would be a reflection of my gotra and hence as a Brahmin I would have to be very careful about the deeds that I do . I hope I have been able to explain the collateral damage that comes with being a Brahmin .Not that I knew about Rishika’s caste or was bothered about it . I was enchanted by her beauty , her smile , her teeth , I was fascinated by the fact that probably for the first time God had really concentrated on his job at hand and made something which could be classified as classy across the classes and the masses.
My first interaction with Rishika was when our school had a science exhibition . She had made a logic gate with diodes . I went near her exhibit . She smiled at me . I felt strange .
“ Yeh kaise kaam karta hai ?” I asked her .
She gave me some strange theory that I could not decipher . Ramesh , my friend who was listening to her explanation exclaimed , “ Hum log ka chopa (fool)bana rahi ho ?”
I looked at him and wondered….. Why did I have to bring him with me ? I had already had a terrible day , missed the school bus , entered the school late, got scolded by the principal and now the one chance I had with the most beautiful girl of my class and this guy was doing his level best to mess it up .
Rishika felt offended . “ Get lost if you want a better logic .” She looked at me and walked away .
I just looked up at the skys and said to the Alimighty , “If you are doing all this , because you love me , please God… love me less .”
We( Rishika and I ) did not talk for the next six months .
My first big break so as to say came when I got a chance to host along with her on a radio talk show . The talk show organizers had asked all Kendriya Vidyalayas of that region to air a half an hour program . Rishika and me were selected as the hosts for our school . I remember, as our group was returning after the talk show had been recorded , she sat beside me in the bus . We started talking about our performances first and then the conversation shifted from the general to the specific . I came to know about her family , her friends and a lot more . That was day I learned more about her than I had done all these months.
Time almost flew , and as two years passed , it was time to bid adieu to our carefree life and start thinking about ways by which the rest of our lives would be messed up. Its as if someone hands you an entry pass that says ADULTS ONLY and all our lives we are left doing serious stuff just to maintain the validity of that pass. Rishika got admitted to an engineering college in Delhi . I had messed up my entrance exams for that college and so missed a chance of a life time . I got admitted in a Bgrade engineering college in Kolkata that had C grade faculty and D grade placements. It was six months later that I decided that engineering was not my forte .At that time the Government was really worried about the rising fiscal deficit and since that sounded like a real cool term I decided to study Economics . So next year , I somehow managed to crack the entrance test of Presidency College for Economics and got myself admitted there .
By the way if you were wondering about what turn my would be love life took , let me tell you it went dead …. Like our BSNL telephone lines do during the monsoons . I lost contact with her . Didn’t have her cell number . For the first two months , I frantically looked for her face or name among model agency websites , matrimonial sections of the newspaper , and even the show India’s Most Wanted , but no sign of her . Then I turned my radar to the latest fad called the internet. I Facebooked , Orkuted and yes even Twittered about everything from my nocturnal bowel movements to the Keyensian Model of Macroeconomics ( the latter did reduce my number of followers on Twitter by half ). But there was no sign of Rishika . As I had mentioned earlier , I never felt an emotion as strong as love for her then . It was just that she was a person I really wanted to know . but alas it was not to be .
In Presidency College certain incidents and events changed my life forever . I would never want to go back to those days nor try to remember those events . But let me tell you ,the first two years of my three year Economics Graduation changed me completely . I lost all my interest in life , in career and more importantly …..in friends .
………………………………………
I was reading a brochure ऑफ़ DRAMATIES while returning in the train ,DRAMATIES, the annual Drama festival that Presidency College organized . Two years before I would have killed to be a part of it . Now … it didn’t matter . nothing did .
“Excuse me , can you please move a little ?” , a voice said to me .
I turned around …. and we both stared at each other .
Rishika was the one who recovered first , “ Prakarsh , wow … I never imagined I would …. Wow ..”
“ Its great to see you again .” I just wanted to tell her how badly I had been searching for her for the first two months , how messy my life had become last year , about all my pains and everything ….
“ What are you doing in Kolkata ?” I asked .
“ Arrey do mahine ka project hai . ISI mein .” she replied .
“ You return by this train everyday ?” , I asked . Please say yes , please say yes , please say yes .
“ Yes , more or less . How are your studies going ?”
“Don’t even bother asking ?”
“ Hey , Shyamnagar aa gaya .” , she descended from the train and looked at me . “ Hope to meet you again .”
I hope so too , I wanted to tell her . But I just smiled .
As I was returning home , my cycle tyre got punctured .
I looked up at the skys and said , If you are doing all this because you love me , please God love me less.
Luckily the train timings for our return journey back home synchronized . It was as if God had felt pity on my pathetic life and send some one I could talk to . I would invariably come early and keep a seat for her in the train. Rishika as usual would arrive at the last moment and say , “Phew , managed to get the train at last .”
One day as we were returning , she asked me about DRAMATIES .
“How do you know about DRAMATIES .” I quizzed her .
“ My friend from Jadavpur told me . She is doing a play . You ofcourse must be doing it too .”
I didn’t reply.
“Helooo , anybody home ? Prakarsh don’t tell me you haven’t given your play for shortlisting .”
“I am not interested in all this anymore .” , I remarked . The pitch of my voice was on the higher side . All the way back , she didn’t talk .
When she was leaving , she told me , “ Prakarsh , this is not you . We may not have talked in Kendriya Vidyalaya much , but I still know something . You should be giving your plays , you are a great writer and a far better actor.. That is what makes you what you are .”
That whole night I couldn’t sleep .
A day after DRAMATIES ended , I was eagerly waiting for Rishika . When she arrived , she almost neglected me and took her seat .
“Rishika , I have something to tell you .” I said .
“First I need to tell you something . You should have played the part of the protagonist and not the villain . “
And then she smiled , mischievously . I looked at her stupefied , as if Harry Potter had just stumped me frozen with the chant “Petrificus Totalus”
“ Don’t tell me you were there in my college , in Derozio Hall ,watching my play , and I never had an inkling of an idea .” I remarked , still not out of the shock .
She chuckled . “ Dekha …”
“But … how did you know that I would be doing the play ? lt was so very last moment”
She looked at me in the eyes , a look that made me feel both vulnerable and strong at the same time .
“Friends know , Prakarsh . That’s why they are friends.”
That night after dinner when Ma was taking the dishes ,after dinner , I helped her . While wiping one of them , I asked her non chalantly , “ Ma .what caste is Bhardwaj .”
“Bhardwajs are Brahmins . Why do you ask ?”
“Umm ..aise hi .” I remarked while my heart pumped an extra litre of blood In my body to congratulate me on fulfilling one of the criteria mentioned in the CONDITIONS APPLY.
When the two months ended , I felt as if I was losing Rishika again,only this time I knew I had feelings that were much more stronger than before . Her project at ISI was complete and she was leaving . I remember how I watched her train leave from the Howrah station . Her parents had come to see her off and so she had asked me not to come to the station . But I had stealthily managed to sneak near her compartment without her parents noticing me . I hid myself behind a crate of Coca Cola , waiting for the train to leave . I wanted time to freeze . I wanted to ask God for one wish … Bring the last two months back .. please … I looked around . May be like a Sharukh khan movie, she would see me and rush out of her compartment . The train should start moving by then or else the desired melodrama would not be produced . And I , like Mr. Sharukh Khan would run , with my arms extended and finally grab her . What would her parents be doing while all this action would be taking place was something that I was least interested in . I looked at her father . Well , he did look like Amrish Puri . That was encouraging , I told myself .Suddenly the engine coughed out smoke and the train started moving and I realized two fundamental things, firstI was no Sharukh Khan ….. and second this was no happy ending Bollywood
flick
.
That night I cried . As I had done last year .
Suddenly my Sony Erricsson 550i started ringing .
“ Whats up hero ?”
“ Rishika ? Its 1 in the morning . Sona nahi hai kya ?”
“I cannot sleep . Tell me the story from your blog .”
I looked at the watch again . “ You are serious ?”
“ Yep” , she replied .
The next twenty minutes a girl lying down ,on the middle berth of Rajdhani Express made a boy in Kolkata read out a story which she could have read any time in the future . But for some strange reason , the boy from Kolkata did not mind this a bit . Not an iota.
“ I will really miss our return journeys together .” , she said after I had told her the seventh time to go to sleep .
I will really miss you Rishika . I wanted to tell her . But some how , the words got lost within me .
That night as I looked up from my window at the starry sky , I found the moon to be a lot brighter , the starts to be more in number . I went near the window and looked up at the sky .
“If you are doing all this because you love me ….. believe me you are doing a damn good job boss .”
And then I fell asleep.
………………………………………….
A story by Pranay Tiwari.
Chapter 3 ….
The past that changed his life will come back to haunt him again ……
Next week.
